Decisions, decisions.

So I don't know what to do.

I'm pretty sure that I suck at blogging. I'm inconsistent at best. I try a little too hard on some of my jokes or just force them out completely. My content is mostly filler with little of the wit and insight that I am used to having. And I can never seem to find an appropriate picture to put on here in my columns now that it's easier than ever to do so.

And I have a second blog that gets treated even worse than this one. So I suck twice as bad.

So. I'm contemplating giving it up for now. Or scrapping the whole thing and starting over. Or just combining the both of them and putting any freaking random thing that I want to on the blog, regardless of whether people like it. I dunno.

Maybe in the morning I'll have come to a decision. For now, the blogs are in a holding pattern.

D

"Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb."

Jut thought I'd try to throw a little content on here for you guys and girls.

So I finally made it to see Batman Begins this weekend. Wow. That's mostly what I can muster at this point as a description. Wow. It really was pulling mostly from Batman: Year One, and that's what it should have been. A re-telling of the Batman origin and what shaped him to be that way. Not just the standard:
1. Parents died
2. Inherited everything
3. Decided to fight the injustices of Gotham
4. Got rubber nipples

They really got it right this time.

I, of course, did find a few things to nit-pick about. And as a geek, I think that is my right; since non-geeks won't notice that shit. But those really were few and far between.

Hell, even Michael Caine won me over as Alfred. I mean, I was really still holding onto Michael Gough still being Alfred (and he always will be in my mind), but Caine really made the role his own.

I even got used to Christian Bale growling his lines whenever he put the cowl on. But what are you gonna do about that? Batman has to have 2 distinctly different voices (Batman & Bruce Wayne for noobs), otherwise, it'd be just taking a pair of glasses off and expecting noone to recognize you in a different outfit. Ever. Although to me, Kevin Conroy will always be the voice of the Batman. (Check out the trivia in Conroy's link)

Katie Holmes. Katie, Katie, Katie. I think I could have gotten a better performance from a cardboard cutout. And for Christ's sake, she ended up in the Bat-cave too! I was just hoping that was an isolated incident with Vicky Vale in Batman, but noooooooo. Apparently Bruce needs a sign outside the waterfall that says "WARNING! If you can get over this gorge and through the waterfall, or if Alfred lets you in through Wayne Manor, you can access the Bat-cave." Secret headquarters my ass.

Sorry. But if you have a few bucks to spare (depending on regional prices), I highly endorse this product/service/food chain/amusement park.

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Free sneak preview of a potential column!!!!

One of the trailers (why are they called trailers when they come before the movie?) was for The Dukes of Hazzard. Am I the only one who's aggravated by this one?

More than likely.

D

"Oscar, why are you so grouchy?" "Because I live in a fucking trash can, bitch!"

Today's show is brought to you by the letters H, N, S and F.
"H" is for "hungover".
"N" is for "never should have stayed at the bar and drank as much as I did".
"S" is for "still kind of drunk and I'm sure everyone at work can tell".
"F" is for "fuck! I am really old!"

I am such a whore for free booze. And everyone knows it too. Dangle that free Jesus Juice in front of me and I'll do just about anything. And after imbibing, I'll probably do whatever it was that I wouldn't do before. They don't call me Liquid Courage for nothing.

So I'm gonna go back to work now. Or try to, at least. It's really gonna be me doing my best "zombie trying to fit in at the office" impression. Me with my glazed over eyes; slack jaw; hunting and pecking at the keyboard; shuffling down the hall moaning; and mumbling something about brains, I mean food.

D

I'll Gladly Pay You Tomorrow For a Computer Today

I need a computer at home.

That's about it. I could be fascinating all 2 of you (seems to be 3 now) with whitty and inspiring tales of fancy with a lot more frequency if I had a 'puter at home. I could hop online, type that shit up and post it on the blog. But the lack of an on-ramp to the Information Super-Highway has severly impeded my progress. And that's derived from the lack of funds. Which is a consequence of having a new car. Which is because I couldn't afford to keep fixing my old one. Which is a result of...nevermind.

So maybe I need to set up a small trust fund for a computer or something. Or just wait until work slows down. Probably #2.

D

Have you ever been karmicly bitch-slapped by a 6 armed goddess?

Life sucks. Ever notice that? No matter how good things are going, there's always got to be something that comes around the corner to knock you on your ass every once in a while. Is it fate? God's will? Destiny (or "density" to George McFly)? Or Karma? I guess maybe Karma. Sounds about as good as anything. I like to call these curious little moments in life "getting a Karmic Bitch-slap". (Patent pending!) This time kiddies, it knocked me down.
Yours truly is swimming in the Singles' Pool again. That's all I have to say on the subject for now. But just figured I'd keep all 2 of you in the loop.

So, I'll get back to y'all when I can. For now, time to wallow.

D

Of course, it could just be the Asian game show in full swing again.