I should just do like Jimmy The Geek and simulate them all on NCAA 2006

Well, I do this every year on paper and in the privacy of home so that no one but me can see how utterly crappy my picks are. But, I figured you guys already know what a retard I am; so publicly posting these won't change your perceptions of me very much.

My picks are in blue.
Any crappy commentary is below that.

GMAC
UTEP (8-3) vs. Toledo (8-3)
Mike Tice is taking the Miners to another bowl game, but I haven't seen them play this year and I have seen Toledo play pretty well on TV.

Pioneer PureVision Las Vegas
BYU (6-5) vs. California (7-4)
I never pick the stormin' Mormons. Golden Bears it is.

San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl
Colorado State (6-5) vs. Navy (7-4)
Gotta pull for former Georgia Southern coach, Paul Johnson.

Fort Worth
Kansas (6-5) vs. Houston (6-5)
I don't know jack about either program this year. First instinct was for Houston, but then I changed to Kansas because I haven't picked a team on the left side yet, but then changed my mind back to the Cougars because you should always go with your first choice, right? So, Jayhawks it is. I bet this one comes back to bite me in the ass.

Sheraton Hawaii
Nevada (8-3) vs. UCF (8-4)
George O'Leary taking UCF to a bowl game after last year's 0-11 season? Shit yeah, pull for them. Might as well pick them too.

Motor City
Memphis (6-5) vs. Akron (7-5)
Come on, people! It's the Zips!

Champs Sports
Clemson (7-4) vs. Colorado (7-5)
I just flipped a coin and it landed on its edge...so, um, Colorado to try and salvage the season after stumbling at the end and firing Rick Neuhiesel?

Insight
Arizona State (6-5) vs. Rutgers (7-4)
I don't care if Rutgers is feeling great for getting in a bowl game. That aint enough to beat the Sun Devils.

MPC Computers
Boise State (9-3) vs. Boston College (8-3)
I like the Broncos and all, but I think I have to give this to ACC battle-tested Boston College instead.

MasterCard Alamo
Michigan (7-4) vs. Nebraska (7-4)
I think this is the first time that the Alamo Bowl has had 2 historically good programs in it at the same time. Too bad they both suck this year. I guess I think the Wolverines suck a little less this year.

Emerald Bowl
Georgia Tech (7-4) vs. Utah (6-5)
Screw Tech. Go Heels!

Pacific Life Holiday
Oregon (10-1) vs. Oklahoma (7-4)
I'm sorry but I'm picking Oregon just out of my love for any team with a duck as the mascot. The fact that they finished 2nd in the PAC 10 doesn't hurt. And I don't like Oklahoma (sorry JR).

Gaylord Hotels Music City
Minnesota (7-4) vs. Virginia (6-5)
Not sure what happened to the Golden Gophers after the great start they had, but I'll give them the nod in this one. Oh, and: Heh heh.."Gaylord"

Vitalis Sun
Northwestern (7-4) vs. UCLA (9-2)
Whatever. The Bruins having both a male and female mascot running around the sidelines at games almost cost them this one. But one of the Josie mascots is kinda cute. Joe & Josie Bruin it is.

Independence
South Carolina (7-4) vs. Missouri (6-5)
Spurrier got his 'Cocks to beat Florida and Tennessee this season and a bowl game? Sure, stick with 'em.

Chick-fil-A Peach
Miami (9-2) vs. LSU (10-2)
This game's almost win-win just for the match up. But LSU couldn't do me the favor of beating UGAy for SEC title, so screw the Bayou Bengals.

Meineke Car Care
South Florida (6-5) vs. NC State (6-5)
*yawn* Wha? Huh?

AutoZone Liberty
Tulsa (8-4) vs. Fresno State (8-4)
This is the Bulldog team that took Southern Cal to the limit earlier...and then lost to Nevada and La. Tech. I guess it just depends on which team decides to show up.

EV1.net Houston
TCU (10-1) vs. Iowa State (7-4)
TCU is 10-1. Good enough for me, 'cause I don't really care.

AT&T Cotton
Texas Tech (9-2) vs. Alabama (9-2)
Jesus! How many freakin' bowl games are there? I'm still picking these damned things? You're still reading this? Well, I'll make Michael happy and say "Roll Tide!"

Outback
Iowa (7-4) vs. Florida (8-3)
What the Hell is a Hawkeye? A bird? An eye? A bird's eye? I know that Hawkeye is an Avenger, but this isn't Clint Barton. *chomp* *chomp*

Toyota Gator
Louisville (9-2) vs. Virginia Tech (10-2)
Ooooooooooh. This ought to be good 'un. A real shoot out if things go well. I'll make Kelley happy with this one and pick the "there's actually no such things as" Hokies.

Capital One
Wisconsin (9-3) vs. Auburn (9-2)
I'm sorry, but I appear to have left my "give a damn" in the car. 2 kind of disappointing teams this year really. Badgers? We don't need no stinking Badgers. Tigers? Yeah, we need them.

Tostitos Fiesta
Notre Dame (9-2) vs. Ohio State (9-2)
Please, please, please, God let the Irish win. Mostly so I can rub it in my dad's face because I know he's going to pick those stupid nuts.

Nokia Sugar
West Virginia (10-1) vs. Georgia (10-2)
I will never ever ever ever ever ever EVER pick UGAy to win anything. If it took them winning to keep me alive, I'd die a happy man knowing that I screwed them over.

FedEx Orange
Penn State (10-1) vs. Florida State (8-4)
Let's finish off JoePa's semi-miraculous season with a BCS Bowl Game win, shall we?

The Rose Bowl Game Presented by Citi
USC (12-0) vs. Texas (12-0)
For the love of God, please let Mack Brown have made a deal with the Devil to finally have his Longhorns be the team to shut Nick Lachey and the rest of the poser USC fans the Hell up! I bet Vince Young wouldn't give two shits about not winning the Heisman if he wins a BCS Championship (notice I didn't put National Championship).

Wow. That took forever. Now I know why I don't do football picks normally. 'Cause I suck at them and despite my urge to waste my time and yours, that was just waaaay too much time that I spent on this post. Hopefully it will at least pay off. Guess we'll find out in a couple of weeks when I total up all my losses.

D